Office Flossing.

I went to the dentist about a month ago.  The hygienist cleaned my teeth then proceeded to have the following dialogue with me using a very serious, low and concerned tone:

“Look, you seem like a girl who takes care of yourself and someone I’d consider healthy.  Well, you have beautiful teeth and I don’t want to tell you this if you don’t want to hear it.  Please just tell me now if you don’t want to hear what it is I’m about to say.” From this I sat up in the chair with my eyebrows raised, my ears perked up, incredibly nervous and curious to know what she was going to say next.  I replied, “No, no please continue!”  In a low, now almost trembling voice she continued, “I just have to tell you this.  If you never brush your teeth again, make sure you do one thing and one thing only.  Floss your teeth.”  I sat back down in the chair laughing inside at what she was telling me.  She went on to talk with both eyes closed, nostrils slightly flared, and in full concentration.  She complained that not enough people flossed out there and how upsetting it was to her.  She repeated, “Look, I’m not trying to sound like a nag and I really don’t want to waste your time nor mine…" lt suddenly felt like I was in a relationship and we were trying to define next steps … "but you don’t want to get older and have gum disease because then nice teeth won’t matter.”  I replied in an equally serious voice, “I really appreciate such concern.  Thank you so much for emphasizing the importance of flossing – you’re not wasting your time.”  And she wasn’t!

She was right, I did not floss enough at all, it seemed only when something was stuck in my teeth.  She sighed a deep breath and then said to me, “Look Tanya, I’m really not trying to be hard on you but this is for your own good.  This is your LIFE, Tanya!  Your LIFE!!”  I sat there and nodded almost frightened at this point – she used my first name, I was definitely in trouble now.  She continued, “I just see so many people coming in here with gum disease which could have been avoided.”  She’s now looking in the other direction as if tears are about to swell up in her eyes.  I replied, “No, really – it’s your job to tell me this, it’s OK!  I really appreciate that you care so much.”  She continued, “I mean ultimately we all do what we want to do and I have no control over your life and the choices anybody makes out there.  So if you don’t want me to talk about this ever again I won’t. Just be honest with me!”  I interrupted, “No really, it’s OK to be upfront with your patients, you have to be, it’s for our own good!” 

She then ran her fingers through her hair shuffling up her bangs, took a deep breath then said in a refreshed voice with a brand new smile on her face, “OK, good.  I feel better.”  I replied, “Yes!  Me too!  I feel better too! I feel GREAT!”

It seemed most appropriate after having such a serious and emotional conversation we should have parted ways with at least a hug, but instead I got up and walked out the door as my appointment was now over.

It’s been days later since we had this chat and guess what I do daily in my office now?  I FLOSS, BABY!  I FLOSS!  After all, this is MY LIFE! And honestly this flossing business at your desk is like the best thing ever.  It’s so easy!  While I’m thinking about something, I’ll floss.  While I’m waiting for a meeting to start, I’ll floss!  I can floss while on the phone or floss while catching up on emails!  Have you ever flossed while driving?  It’s perfect!  I had no idea flossing was going to be this easy.

No one had ever communicated the seriousness of flossing to me in this tone, using these words, with this level of seriousness.  And guess what, guys? IT WORKED!  Thanks to my wonderful hygienist, I just saved my gums!  She is going to be so proud of me next time I see her, that’s all I have to say!

-Tanya the born again flosser

It’s Just My Thing.

I’ve been reflecting on a feeling I’ve been having and writing and re-writing about that feeling but I can’t quite put my finger on what that feeling is or means.  That feeling has to do with me thinking about how I want to live my life.  This all sounds super serious and dramatic as if I’m going to walk down a path in unknown territory here, but it’s nothing like that. 

 

I’ve started this entry multiple times by writing about about different houses I’ve lived in trying to describe this feeling but that wasn’t really it. 

I then started writing about friends, but that too didn’t describe the feeling I was trying to articulate and the thoughts I’ve been having.

I started to write about places to live.  Nope, not even close.

 

Oranges?  I peeled a very sour one this afternoon not to mention God knows I’ve written about apples.  Nope, not that either…

 

This entry might feel similar to that of my favorite things entry but is still different.  That talked about things I love.  This is more about how I want to be. 

I figured the best way to write about this feeling was to simply get the thoughts written down knowing I risk making zero sense to anyone but myself with possibly no point in the end nor conclusion.  So here it is guys… here is where I throw myself fearlessly into the flames of my own feelings and I really don’t even know why.. that’s the beauty of this being tanyaswebb.spaces.live.com.  I can write whatever I want and it never has to make any sense to anyone!  I can have typos and incorrect grammar and I don’t care because this is MY BLOG!  And you can do it too, my friends on spaces.live com – Sign Up Today! J 

 

So back to this feeling….

 

There is a vision I have for my life that I hope to achieve one day.  I don’t know where this vision came from since pieces of it are very different from the life I’ve known but quite familiar to lives I’ve seen.  The life I want to live involves a few key things…I want to live in a major city.  I want my life to be extremely simple with little to no complexities.  I want to love my God with all of my heart.  I want to eat a lot of vegetables and fruits.  I want to listen to my zenful music each and every day.  I want to love my family and friends till they hate me and feel smothered.  I wouldn’t mind a dog even.  I would love to live in an old house which has been renovated with modern updates but still retaining its old world character and charm.  I want to organize and become efficient.  I want quality over quantity.  I want to love my grocery store and always enjoy my grocery shopping experience.  I want peace.  I want to cook most of my meals and be very picky about eating out.  I want to make the most awesome brunch at home on Saturday mornings that you can’t even move for the rest of the day.  I want things easy.  I want to be able to walk to places though those places don’t have any real requirements as to what they have to be.  I want to have a positive attitude.  I want healthy living to play a large role in my life.  I want to love.  I want my time with girlfriends always, who continue to keep me sane.  I want to celebrate holidays at my house where I’ve mastered how to plan so well, the crazy chicken is a memory of the past.  I want to assert and stand up for myself when I need to yet always remain tactful.  I want to be surrounded by light.  I want to have the most fulfilling relationship I can have, doing my part with the person I decide to marry.  I want to always celebrate the Spring season when it arrives.  I want to find that thing that clicks for me professionally so I can see myself take off as I’ve always envisioned.  I want to do up Halloween with pumpkins and the whole works.  I want to celebrate aging, not be sad about it.  I want to enjoy coffee shops and book stores.  I want to be the best possible parent ever taking the time to do it right.  I want to always enjoy nature and respect our environment.  I want to appreciate the little things.  I want to let others win sometimes too.  I want to volunteer my time and help where help is needed.  I want to be forgiving and be forgiven.  I want to read the newspaper not always relying on my laptop for news.  I want to have compassion.  I want to continue to write about meaningless topics whenever I feel like it.  I want to practice power yoga.  I want to eat dried fruit and nuts always.  And I always want to continue to be inspired, learn more, and contribute to the greater good.  This is what I want.  My Life.  My Card.  American Express.  J

 

This is just my thing.

 

tanya  

 

http://images-2.redbubble.net/img/art/size:large/view:main/9137-9-simplicity.jpg

In Sickness and In Health.

I’m addicted to reading a friend’s daily status and blog updates on his current health condition.  In June 2008, he was diagnosed with a blood disorder called Myelodyspastic Syndrome (MDS). This means his bone marrow is unable to produce enough redblood cells, white blood cells or platelets.  He is currently undergoing treatment for this and every day I find myself in front of my laptop with my face buried in my hands reading how he’s doing.  What a brave guy he is and the positivity coming out in his blogs is just inspiring.  I’m completely fascinated and it’s given me an opportunity to really think about the important things. 

 

The donor who gave him her cells for the transplant deserves a gold medal.  A 22-year old girl who was discovered out of 10 million donors… can you imagine?  My friend was recently married, he has his whole life to look forward to being young, super artistic, creative, fun, smart, genuine, amazingly positive attitude ever since I met him 4 years ago, you name it.  But I find myself consumed in the thoughts that life is just so fragile, it is such a delicate thing.  Never waste not even a moment.  And then I think of the times I was upset about something, petty, held a grudge against someone for something so trivial, missed out on a moment of life where I could have been forgiving, finding peace, not sweating the small stuff.  That kills me because at the end of the day, we are but simple beings, with futures and destinies we don’t even know about, and come the day where it is our time to leave this place, how stupid and foolish we will feel for wasting even a second of it on stupid, meaningless things.  How incredibly stupid.  I will feel stupid.  But anxious and concerned for this poor guy who’s going through hell right now, even I realize the flaws and stupidity I have inside and realize patience, kindness, love, peace – everything we’re taught from birth, should be in focus so much more than it is.

 

I know what people say to this though.  They excuse such changes and improvements with phrases like, “easier said than done”… or “but we’re only human.”  Both of these things are very true, but they are true because we use them as excuses and as a crutch to never get better and improve.  EVERYTHING is easier said than done.  Saying is by mouth.  Doing is by action.  As for only being human, no kidding.  Last I looked if I’m talking to you, you’re human.  So what does all this have to do with anything at all, here?  I’ll give you a shiny star for such an unoriginal, generic, meaningless comment though.  You see, I actually find love a lot easier than anger.  And kindness a lot easier than rudeness.  And understanding a lot easier than judgments.  Spread the love, people.  You have tons of it in you.. we see it all the time.   Trash the cynic in you.  What’s the point, you’re going to grow old and grumpy which can’t possibly be fun at all and it will show on your face and you’ll look like a sourpuss the rest of your life.  I mean what is so great about that?  But I too find myself reverting to the ways of the world and being one of those people I am talking about in forgetting our whole purpose here and the life we choose to make it.  I am guilty of not doing the right thing, or thinking the right thoughts each and every moment.  So what do we do?

 

Every day we don’t have to breathe using a machine we should be grateful. 

If we have to use that machine, at least we have that machine to use.

Every day we can wake up from the comfort of our own beds, we should be grateful.

Every day we can get in our cars in which we could afford to buy and drive to our jobs which we still have, we should be grateful.

We have access to heat, water, electricity. 

We use electric toothbrushes and hair blow dryers and stoves and ovens.

Our clothes are stylish and we choose what to wear. 

We groom ourselves and pay money to get manicures, pedicures and hair removed from our faces.

We spend money, lots of money on eating out, on coffee (guilty as charged), on other edible luxuries.

We are safe, not worrying about our physical security, not fearing bombs, explosions, wars.

Everything is so convenient too and is at our very fingertips thanks to technology. 

We have no excuses here…

 

Don’t feel bad about the things you do, that’s not my message here, but remember all that you have next time you want to get pissed at someone for cutting you off on the highway.  How do YOU know that very person did not just lose their parent, lose their job, or what might be going in their life.  Act kindly. You never understand another’s shoes until you wear them and perhaps there is a reason that person is rushing by you in which you just don’t know about.  We’ll never be able to control those around us.  We’ll only be able to control how we react to them.  

 

So all in all, I really hope to give a little more, love a little more, be grateful a whole lot more, not to forget, way more thankful.  I am happy for my health and perhaps I need to be a little bit more conscience and aware of that as well.  Whenever I want to think the worst about others, I need to think about how I can help them instead.   And if I can’t exactly help them, don’t waste a negative moment or thought dwelling on it.. because life is really just way too short for all this.  Life is way too fragile to take for granted in that what we have today, will still exist tomorrow.  You just never know.

 

In the meantime I’ll continue to pray for my friend, who already seemed so centered to begin with… thanking him for making me realize just how short life is, and what it is I really need to work on, ya know, the important things in life.  Thank you very much for this reminder.   

 

Getting over myself, oh yes I am…

Tanya

Sick & Tired

GOSH PEOPLE!!!

 

I am going on day #5 of this crap.  I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired.  I’ve drugged myself, practically killed myself, felt comatosed at times, trying to get this crap out of my system but to no avail, I sit here on the couch coughing up crap.  Sorry.. yah that’s gross.  I know.  Think of how I feel…

 

I’ve been spreading my kudies around on top of it making others sick, too!  This is so not good, people.  Not even ice cream has cheered me up.  My head feels like it’s going to explode any second and I’ve missed 2 days of work already this week.

 

So what else, what else?

 

My Kim was here.  I love my Kim. She’ll be here next month as well.  I love next month.  I also love watching America’s Next Top Model which is what I’m watching right now.  Jael cracks me up!  She’s awesome!  

 

I went to La Spiga on Saturday night.  Two thumbs up.  I’m excited for the big party(s) this weekend. Yay. I want to watch the movie, “Disturbia” which is now playing.  I hate scary movies.  I saw a new VW model the other day on the freeway that I had not seen which was so darling!  I love my mom.  She’s awesome.  The Baggy Pig still makes me laugh.  I have new music that I listen to on repeat.  My cell phone is about to die.  FREE TIBET!!!

 

OK folks, it’s time for more nyquil.. as if I’m not loopy enough.

 

Aurevoir!

Mission Fitness

This weekend there was a definite theme and maybe it was due to feeling under the weather lately, I’m not sure.  NYE Resolution #2: Health. 

 

For those of you plugged into dodgeball.com know (not necessarily wanting to know, I’m sure) Sanaz and I spent late Friday night eating dinner at the Downtown Purple Cafe, Saturday midnight grocery shopping at the Bellevue QFC, and Sunday day at the Kirkland Costco restocking our refrigerators with "mission fitness" friendly items such as dried fruit, tons of vegetables, yummy granola, fruit, different cheeses, salad stuff, etc.  After thoroughly discussing our health goals together Friday night, the rest of the weekend we executed on our mission to turn into healthy, fit and happy girls.  Saturday morning at 9:45am I surprisingly drove myself to ProClub for an awesome work out.  It felt FANTASTIC!  Sunday morning Sanaz and I met up at the gym and did it all over again. 

So here are our near-term goals:

 

• No more eating out… well at least for 1 week.  Baby steps, people.  So yes, our routine Wednesday nights @ Purple… GONE. 
• ProClub Tuesdays/Thursdays/Saturdays & Sundays.  Yes, weekend sleeping in… GONE.
• No more chocolate, bagels. diet pop or anything else containing aspartame.  Diet cherry coke and Noah’s… GONE. 

But here’s where we won’t compromise:

• Continue eating what we want except for those above.  Do not deprive ourselves!  Starbucks, croissants,  trail-mix… YOU STAY.
• Eating together continues, just not in restaurants.  Wednesdays are our new eat-together-someone-cooks-for-the-other day.  YAY.
• The gym is meant for fun.  So what if you only use the steam room while you’re there.  Sooner or later you’ll start to use the rest of the facility.  NO WORRIES.

This is our plan.  I’m super excited!!  I have not worked out consistently in over a year, with the occasional STA on the side which I’ve been more consistent with lately as well.  Eating wise, well for most of 2006 I forgot to eat but towards the end I made up for the other 11 months.  This is the time to take charge and begin our mission fitness… plus I have some awesome new recipes I will be posting :)

 

YAY FOR HEALTHY LIVING 2007!!  WHAHOO!

 

Next on the list.. time to plan our girls trip!!!